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beeceit · 2 years ago

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The Broken Leo

Disclaimer: I know I don't typically do angst for the Peepaw Multiverse (which is also why I typically don't involve itbotb Leo in it) but I got to thinking, and itbotb Leo would have... very complicated feelings about meeting so many other hims

(The itbotb canon self-worth issues, alcohol issues, and a brief mention of suicidal thoughts made it into this, so watch out for those) WMAS Leo belongs to @chiangyorange who also inspired this with this comic

Leo tapped his claws against his glass, looking around the room.

The situation was ridiculous and honestly a little frightening. (Seriously, what evil god would allow THIS many Leos to coexist in one room?! Something very very important would be breaking soon and the whole multiverse would explode because some idiot tried to make ramen without the water, or something equally stupid.) But the scariest part for Leo was that every other version of himself he could see seemed so…

Happy.

Why wasn’t he? What, because he was missing an arm? Big whoop, he’d already counted five other hims missing something. Coin with his amputated leg (and really, he should be grateful it was only an arm), 2 was missing an arm too, didn’t even really have a stump to speak of. Expendable was not only missing an arm, but his shell was in horrible shape and his eye looked enough like his own Raph’s that he’d bet real money that he was at least partially blind.

And he was feeling this way well before he lost it.

Because of the prison dimension, then? He was there an hour at most. Hourglass and Deal had both been there so much longer and got hurt so much worse. And yet there they were, just laughing and talking like old friends, and they’d only just met. Deal was even drinking soup out of his hands, Leo couldn’t even imagine going through trauma like he had and still managing to be able to be so silly. No, the problem was him.

The problem was always him.

What was wrong with him? His dad was finally there and opening up and listening, his family finally trusted him, he got along with Casey famously. Even his future self was there for him! Everybody was! He just needed to stop being such a self-obsessed dickhead and talk to them! Why was this so hard? Leo sighed and looked around to make sure no one was looking before reaching into his pouch and pulling out a bottle of calamine lotion. Well… it had been calamine lotion. Now it was just a cleaned out bottle he used to hide his emergency vodka in. It didn’t hold much (It couldn’t. He couldn’t afford his brothers getting suspicious, after all.) but it was enough. He poured a generous glug into his diet coke before concealing the bottle again. There was a bar in this place for the older Leos, it would be fine. If anyone got suspicious, he could just claim it was Blue’s and he stole a sip because he was curious. That was normal teenager behavior, right?

What a fucking mess he was.

It was bad enough, knowing how weak he was amongst his family, knowing he was the only one struggling like this, but this? This was so much worse. So many hims, going through so much worse, how was he the only one struggling this hard? How was he the only one who couldn’t handle it? This wasn’t just one universe calling him a failure, it was dozens.

“Should’ve just let Prime finish me off when he had the chance.” He muttered to himself, taking a long sip.

Leo felt a bump against his shoulder.

“Hey, you say something?” Leo jumped, turning to see another Leo sitting next to him. “Shit! Sorry, uh, spaced out. How long have you been there?” The other Leo snorted. “Just a minute, dude, don’t worry about it. You good?” Leo blinked before shrugging and putting on the carefree mask, hoping it wouldn’t fail him like it had done more and more lately. “Nah, I’m fine, don’t worry about it. Just, uh, just overwhelmed. This whole situation is wack as all hell.”

“Yeah, I get that. I still haven’t figured out how to get this name tag thing off. I mean, what does WMAS even mean?! And why is there an orange on it?”

“I’ve been saying it like Christmas in my head.” “Of course you would. Why is yours so long, anyways?”

“Dude, I have no idea. My Blue’s matches, so I guess our dimension is just itty-bot-buh with a… deer-bee thing? I don’t know, man.” WMAS snorted. “You call yours Blue, too?” “Dad picked it. It’s still weird, him actually calling me by my name without it meaning I’m in trouble.” “Yeah, I feel that. …you, uh… you wanna go pet the big scary magic dog with me?” Leo raised an eyebrow and looked over at Havoc, who was currently giving a death glare to a big Leo that had gotten too close to Hourglass for comfort. “I think that’s a fox.” “He’s fluffy, it makes him a dog.” Leo rolled his eyes and chugged the rest of his drink before standing. “Eh, I’ll bite. I didn’t have anything better to do anyways.” Blue looked on from across the room with a frown.

I’m so sorry, kid.

#in the bottom of the bottle #peepaw multiverse

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afraid-of-squadra · 1 year ago

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May I please ask for poly la squadra headcanons (Sorlato included) with my Tira please

https://www.tumblr.com/crazyyanderefangirlfan/708253472236142592/tira-columbina

Also Hi I’m new

Hello!

This is a great amount of info to analyze, so I hope you forgive me if there’re any inconsistencies.

She is probably the closest with Risotto, Formaggio and Prosciutto. Risotto appreciates her softer side paired with professionalism. Prosciutto can discuss how to better other members’ skills and general well-being with her, coordinating their methods. Formaggio likes to mess with her, as he does with everybody else, but at least she’s actually fun.

Risotto is a very busy man that takes no nonsense from anybody. However, he is a little more relaxed in her company – her Stand is very strong, so at least he doesn’t have to worry THAT much about something happening to her.

Ghiaccio is always riled up, and the dolls do get on his nerves every time he sees them in the “wrong” place. He starts screaming immediately, the noise gathering others, and doesn’t stop until Risotto tells him to shut up or Melone manages to calm him down. The worst thing Tira can do is actually argue with him. He will apologize after an hour or so, of course, but for the love of God, have her keep the dolls out of the shared spaces strictly. They have an image to maintain.

Melone, on the other hand, is rather pleased with the dolls. Hell, he’d play with them if Tira asked. Illuso may mock him however much he wants, but if it makes Tira happy, Melone is happy as well. He is very curious about them regardless. Who made them, how long ago, how rare they are, do they have names, does she believe they’re haunted (he’s ecstatic if they are)… He wants to know everything.

Pesci is scared of the porcelain dolls. Barbies and such are fine, but those porcelain, possibly haunted ones… Illuso, Formaggio, Sorbet and Gelato forced him to watch one too many scary movies, please keep the dolls away from this guy or he might get a stomachache from all the stress. That mammoni…

Prosciutto is probably the most fitting and most similar to her out of the bunch. He has a lot of respect and care for her, his gallantry fits compliment her feminine visage, in public they look like a movie couple, and out of that, they probably coexist just as harmoniously, a few specific kinds of situations excluded.

Illuso is an ass, we all know that. No idea how Tira even tolerates him, probably wants to strangle him to death from time to time? He does tease her less than others, though, almost as rarely as he does Prosciutto, for an obvious reason – he knows she’d fight back. If he sees her angry or upset, he hides into the mirror and stays there. However, as rare and unusual it is for him to offer anybody comfort, Tira is probably the only person who gets such treatment.

Formaggio is a sweet guy while she’s on his good side. He doesn’t mind the dolls at all, even shrinking himself to their size as a joke. If she has a dollhouse, he will happily agree to shrink them both to hang out there (who’s useless now, huh, Illuso?). But if he’s in a certain mood or if they had a fight… Well, Formaggio is one of the crueler members of the squad. He won’t start a full-blown Stand fight (by God, he knows he’d lose), but he has many other ways to get on her nerves until they either have a shouting match or she gets so upset he feels bad and immediately tries to make up for his little shit ways.

Sorbet and Gelato are very hard to tolerate unless you are them. Sorbet is mostly just…silent. He doesn’t talk to people. He may love them as much as he is able to love, but he won’t talk to people unless he has something to criticize or money to demand. Gelato is extremely clingy. When he’s not glued to Sorbet, he’s glued to Tira, either following her around like a puppy (more like a bloodthirsty war hound, but anyways) or demanding to cuddle. And if she denies him, he gets upset, then angry and then vindictive.

However much she enjoys teasing others up to smacking them jokingly, Illuso, Risotto and Prosciutto would take none of this shit. Formaggio or Gelato may laugh it off, Melone and Sorbet just ignore it, Ghiaccio grumble but otherwise just take it, poor sweet Pesci is used to it. But Illuso WILL change her alarm to Barbie Girl and hide some of her stuff in the mirror world and Prosciutto WILL scold her for such a show of disrespect. Risotto will just give her a glare and silent treatment. They take their tough guy image very seriously. Especially Prosciutto.

Her kindest gestures do raise a lot of questions to others. Most sigh and move on with their life, Illuso and Formaggio may take a couple jabs at her, but… Sorbet and Gelato are dumbfounded, not in a good way. Sorbet thinks it is unwise (what do you mean, you entertain children FOR FREE?), Gelato, being a cruel man in general, may even sabotage it all. It’s not out of malice or spite (so they assure themselves), they are just concerned that she will “grow soft”.

Risotto and Pesci are by far the most accepting of her being generally a better person than them all. They find it endearing, a reason to love her more. As long as she does everything well, this is a good quality. Formaggio, Melone and Sorbet are always trying to push her to be a bit meaner. After all, if she’s a good person, they feel inadequate. They need to bring her down to their level.

Any time there is a fight between the guys, it eventually turns into “hey, Tira, tell him he’s wrong”, as if she is their mom or something. All in all, them being mostly very competitive as well, they ARE fighting for her attention from time to time (even Pesci tries to do that, except he gets shut down very quickly).

I hope you like these!

#la squadra #jjba #jjba headcanons #vento aureo #la squadra di esecuzione #la squadra x reader #la squadra headcanons #formaggio #illuso #prosciutto #risotto nero #melone #pesci #gelato #sorbet #ghiaccio

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shadowthestoryteller · 1 year ago

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Green Movement rant coming in because I am nearing a breaking point with the hypocrisy of it all

TLDR; I’m sick to the back teeth of the green movement crying “equality and inclusion” only to turn around and cast aside anyone whom they don’t view as valuable for whatever reason their fickle minds decide at the time

Environmental Movement: We seek to build an equitable/accessible future for all!

Also Environmental Movement: Charges 60$ for course texts, leaves blue collar workers (namely coal miners) out of the equation entirely, is full of policies that look good on paper but utterly fall apart when put into practice, blames people who live in country areas for all pollution issues when cities are a hotspot for all sorts of pollution, blames people who eat meat for all that’s wrong in the world despite meat being one of the more accessible foods, is filled to the gills with leaders who follow “good for me not for thee” policies, and I could just go on and on

Look, I’m all for more sustainable practices that are actually effective and not just virtue signaling. I want to have biodiversity and healthy human communities that coexist with nature in a manner that is healthy for both parties while still allowing sustainable and wise use of resources.

But the longer I’m in this damn field (and that’s just academia!), the more disillusioned and jaded I get. So many times I find that when they say “diversity”, all they mean is diversity of APPEARANCE, not thought. If you say you want EVERYONE to have good things, then that has to mean people whom you disagree with.

That sometimes means that while you and Billy Bob Joe over here agree that green spaces are vital to a healthy community, you may disagree on the extent of climate change. Hell, they may outright disagree that it’s even happening. The last thing you want to do is fly off the handle and call them ignorant because their views don’t align 100% with yours.

Spoiler alert, that ain’t how the real world works. It’s fine and dandy for the internet, but not irl. You don’t get progressive points, you just become the person at work whom people avoid because you’re always walking around with a “I’m better than you” mentality. Any valid points you may have had are borderline useless because people will refuse to talk to you on anything because the last time they did, you erupted on them/made them feel like shit

I have coal mining on both sides of my family. I’ve mentioned this before, but I’m saying it again. The triage mentality found within the environmental movement sickens me. I’ve literally read pieces that argue for replacing coal with natural capita such as “sunshine and forests”. Yeah, that’ll go over well with people who already exist below the poverty line and already struggle to make ends meet.

News flash: Coal miners would be MORE than happy to switch to something renewable if it met the economic and energy output of coal. But there’s nothing. Or if there is, I sure ain’t heard of it in my Bachelors OR Masters programs.

If you say you want an accessible/equal future for ALL, you better damn well mean everyone.

#I don’t really do vents #BUT I AM FED UP #this has just been building for a while #environment #environmental studies #natural resources #green movement #environmentalism #tw vent #coal mining #coal #environmetalists

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subbyfoxelf · 2 years ago

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my dream crossovers

this was another patreon-exclusive post that i'm posting here now because i'm not on patreon anymore. this one was from august of 2022.

i’ve been reading a lot of crossover comics lately between my alien vs. predator reviews and i also recently read (and really enjoyed) the teenage mutant ninja turtles/batman crossover.

on that note, i will say that there are a few i would definitely do if they didn’t already exist? including the aforementioned batman/teenage mutant ninja turtles crossover, as well as teenage mutant ninja turtles/power rangers (i would totally redo this one if it were only the next mutation/power rangers in space crossover, but there’s also a comic book that has the mighty morphin power rangers meeting the ninja turtles), king kong vs. planet of the apes, star trek/planet of the apes and teenage mutant ninja turtles/ghostbusters.

i also probably would’ve wanted to do like a star trek vs. star wars type deal back when i was way more into star wars, but i’m just so apathetic about the star wars franchise at this point that it really just doesn’t seem like a good thing for me to try to weigh in on. or any other star wars crossover, for that matter.

so! with all of those being cleared out of the way, let’s get into my dream crossovers that i would love to see become a reality.

godzilla vs. gamera

this is literally the first one that always occurs to me when this topic comes up, and the bitch of it is it almost happened. kadokawa actually approached toho in 2002 and offered to co-produce the mega-crossover, but unfortunately toho declined. the two did battle each other in a stage show in 1970, but otherwise the standard bearers for their respective kaiju universes have yet to properly meet.

thinking about what form this epic showdown could take, obviously the difficulty curve on a comic book feels like it should be the lowest, and is often where these kinds of crossovers start. unfortunately i’m actually not really super versed in godzilla’s comic book exploits, so i can’t really meaningfully comment on this. but considering godzilla vs. charles barkley was a thing back in the 90s and godzilla vs. the mighty morphin power rangers is a thing today, it feels like he should be able to take gamera on in comic book form, right?

the ultimate goal would be a live-action movie, though. and as much as i do love legendary’s cgi godzilla movies this would obviously be a suitmation affair. the plot will work itself out, i mean, it’s godzilla vs. gamera. as long as you give me what it promises on the tin, we’re gonna be fine.

sonic the hedgehog/teenage mutant ninja turtles

my starting point here is that a lot of the characters just match up very well. shads and leo are very serious and dedicated. knux and raph are angy and strong in so many ways. donnie and tails do machines. mikey and sonic are extremely silly and have absolutely the biggest, kindest hearts on their respective teams.

you lose this a bit with the primary villains as eggman is much more comically inept than literally any version of shredder other than the 1987 cartoon or next mutation. but if you bring satam eggman energy to the character you can probably have them coexist either as rival bad guys or teaming up to make everyone’s lives miserable.

obviously eggman is going to make all kinds of turtle-themed robots for this shit, fuck. probably mecha or metal versions of all the turtles, too. dude has one move and he’s gonna use it.

teenage mutant ninja turtles vs. x-men

the only acceptable medium for this is an animated movie, the overall look of which will be based on the 90s arcade games. the x-men team will be composed of the characters you’re able to select from in the arcade game: cyclops, colossus, wolverine, storm, nightcrawler, and dazzler.

the story will be very simple. the turtles and x-men will start off fighting through shredder/magneto’s minions separately and end up fighting each other at first but then end up teaming up when they realize shredder and magneto are working together. these will be the arcade game versions of both villains, so shredder will basically be a less pathetic version of his cartoon self and magneto will have no real character other than being evil and powerful.

teen titans/teenage mutant ninja turtles

look i know this list is very heavy with ninja turtles, but it’s just kind of amazing how many high profile mashups with the ninja turtles have been left on the table. also in the x-men crossover they had “mutant” in common, and in this one they have “teenage” in common, so we’re staying on theme, alright?

for this crossover i’m thinking we get the dc animated movie universe version of the teen titans. y’know, the ones from justice league vs. teen titans and teen titans: the judas contract. i just love this lineup with nightwing and starfire as their fearless leaders, i’d love more time to develop damian wayne robin and raven’s relationship, and beast boy and blue beetle are just the absolute best boys.

cyborg can come too.

sonic the hedgehog/batman

on paper there’s absolutely no reason this should work, but i’m sorry i just need sonic fanboying all over bats, shads trying to out-edgy him, knux taking damian or jason under his wing, tails bonding with tim drake over brain stuff and/or dick grayson over favorite sidekick stuff, and alfred just being sassy about literally everything.

also maybe flash can make a cameo just to set up the obvious race between him and sonic.

x-files vs. resident evil

you really think a zombie outbreak happens in a major city without fox mulder catching wind of it and bursting into the office that morning with a hearty “scully you’re not gonna believe this”?

given that i’m referencing the larger raccoon city outbreak i’d want this to be set around when resident evil 2 came out (1998), which places it around when season 6 of the x-files and the x-files movie came out. so obviously live-action is right out, so we’d be looking at either a comic book or cgi movie.

my thinking here is that mulder hears about the early stages of the outbreak from either the lone gunmen or one of his other sources. mysterious outbreak, corporate and police overreach, does this not sound like exactly the setup for an x-files episode? scully rolls her eyes at all his insinuations that they’re about to be in a real-life zombie movie but is happy to go along to try to deal with the weird police state bullshit happening, they see some creepy stuff early on and then get caught in the thick of the huge outbreak.

eventually they meet up with leon and claire and kick all kinds of zombie ass before making a desperate escape on the train and then we get some patented mulder/scully field note typing voiceovers (or text boxes if it’s a comic) to close things out.

out of all of these, this might be the one i have the clearest idea in my head of what it would be like. even though it’s probably not a crossover that would occur to most people unprompted, it feels kind of like a no-brainer when you think about it.

she-ra (2018) vs. thundercats (2011)

due to the tragic cancellation of the extremely fun thundercats reboot after just one season, this is the least likely one to actually happen. but, c’mon! the main hero has a sword with superpowers, there’s furries, this one is kinda obvious!

i think our catboys think the horde are the good guys at first because animal people are much more well-represented there, setting up the lion-o vs. adora fight. but when they figure out the horde are the bad guys, we get lion-o vs. catra! also mumm-ra teams up with the horde probably.

honorable mentions

star trek/ninja turtles

i don’t have much of a justification for this or an idea of how it would work, but idw owns both licenses and there were action figures depicting all the turtles as star trek characters so obviously i’m not the first one to have this thought!

teenage mutant ninja turtles vs. universal monsters

another one there were crossover action figures of. make it happen!

teenage mutant ninja turtles/kung fu panda

i didn’t super want to go to the trouble of fleshing this one out, but it feels like another no-brainer. and obviously mikey would have the biggest crush on tigress after she beat him up. obviously.

james bond vs. mission: impossible

another one i didn’t super want to flesh out, but ethan hunt’s real superpower is having friends so he’d kick james bond’s ass.

the owl house/she-ra (2018)

sadly i wasn’t really able to come up with a super concrete idea for this one, but both of these cartoons hit such similar spots that it really feels like there should be something here.

#godzilla #gamera #sonic the hedgehog #teenage mutant ninja turtles #x-men #teen titans #batman #x-files #resident evil #she-ra #thundercats #thundercats 2011 #star trek #universal monsters #kung fu panda #james bond #mission: impossible #the owl house

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jgxjess · 2 years ago

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Sometimes I really start to feel like a Guinea pig when it comes to my health.

Every month, for the rest of my life, I will likely have to inject myself with medicine for my psoriasis and psoriatic arthritis just to be able to function. No big deal, I’m used to it. I accept I have an incurable auto immune disease. That’s my lot in life. Whatever works.

And it’s been working great. It starts to wear off a bit a week before my next shot is due, but otherwise fine. But now my finger is busted and inflamed. The course of prednisone worked good until randomly halfway through it started to wear off and my finger became sore and swollen again.

So I’m taking the pain meds my doctor recommended me and they work pretty good, but not 100%. The tip of my index finger hurts and feels rock solid almost. So what do we do? I can’t keep taking pain meds or the prednisone. I can’t switch injections..

I feel like my health is a slider and it’s impossible to get them all to be in sync. Move one slider to the left, one of the others will jump out of the Goldilocks zone and mess up. Move another, same thing happens. I can’t get shit to coexist.

It was all fine until I randomly started using my phone a looot back in February. It’s like there’s these hidden pitfalls everywhere for me to step in over the most random shit that just causes everything else to go haywire. And I just have to accept it.

#personal #health update #long post #my jaw is still fucked up too #I feel like everything about me is just slightly off #I need to be torn apart and put back together again

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starsofsin · 2 days ago

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I vented about this on a Discord server (hi for those who are also from that server), but I also really want to talk about it here because this is a space I feel others will have the same thoughts.

A reason why I don’t like talking with other systems too much is when they treat fictives like sources without asking.

Emojis used are a green heart and a TV. Any text in brackets is the plain text for bold/italicized/both text.

💚 for example is fine [fine] with being related back to source, he is source connected and they don’t mind it. But you just need to ask first for what is/isn’t okay to bring up [just need to ask first for what is/isn’t okay to bring up]. Their source is a heavy tie in factor for us, which is why he’s our primary host and has been for over a few years.

But I (for emoji 📺 but a Vox fictive) don’t entirely enjoy being related to source. Source is something we don’t entirely like engaging with but it’s mainly how people react to it. I will say this. I cannot help what my source is, I cannot help that I am here, I am just here to do what I can for the system because I spawned in for some reason [I cannot help what my source is, I cannot help that I am here, I am just here to do what I can for the system because I spawned in for some reason].

Now, I’m not the only one from this source that doesn’t like being connected, but he also doesn’t mind it. That’s Ducky/Lucifer. He doesn’t mind relations as long as you ask to make connections and ask what is/isn’t okay to bring up. Because he is also connected in his own ways and, like 💚, some things cause him and the rest of us problems when talked about.

What a majority of us fictives hate is when someone, who is also a system, treats us like we’re just our source. Thirsting from source (💚 is the prime dealer of this, they hate it), treating us like source (like I’m scum of the earth even though I’m better), or not seeing us as our own person.

Yes, we can still be source connected and be our own person. That is something that should be able to coexist together within system spaces. It’s getting beyond annoying hearing the same “you need to disconnect from source or stay like source!” That’s not always how it works. Some fictives/factives have no choice in the matter due to how it can relate to trauma the body has faced.

I’m blasting our ex if you can’t tell because I have no remorse and they don’t follow us. I’m better, but when it comes down to airing dirty laundry, I like getting it out before it sits on us.

I’m glad that their Angel and Val are there to help them. I’m supportive of them for doing what they can to help benefit their system. But it feels like their Angel only wanted Ducky from source, because he acts like the source he comes from. Depressed, anxiety filled, not all there, silly. I am similar to my own character but I view myself as better (NPD symptom holder, for the obvious).

I got upset that people were treating their Val like source, exactly like it. “You’re a sack of shit,” “(insert death threat),” “(insert threat,” things like that. That didn’t fly with me. Because any source connection I have seen tends to be out of trauma and to help process those thoughts, feelings, emotions, and/or memories.

You would think that, by now, the system community would stop being so damn toxic to other traumatized individuals but that’s a wish and a half.

For the people that preach to source separate, you should stop treating alters like source if you hate them being connected so much [For the people that preach to source separate, you should stop treating alters like source if you hate them being connected so much]. It makes you sound like you just want systems that have different brain functions to act like how you want them to because of your black and white thinking.

And this is where the next issue comes in from.

Someone’s brain will take in information, even a show, differently than what your brain will. It will be different in the span of things. Just because a show can fill in gaps does not mean both people are taking in the same information [Someone’s brain will take in information, even a show, differently than what your brain will. It will be different in the span of things. Just because a show can fill in gaps does not mean both people are taking in the same information].

You can share a source, but unless that alter is someone in your system, I do not consider them “sourcemates” because we are separate people. Our brains have not connected the same way. I can appear to be something completely different to how another system views me. That is normal. But that does not mean to get upset when an alter doesn’t act the way you want them to or believe they “should” act. That goes for other systems and singlets alike.

But back to the drama. Ducky dated Angel for like… a few months. And then it got bad. “Text us more” during depressive episodes when they wouldn’t even text, got tired of it (there is more than just this in the timeframe, such as getting so overbearing alters stopped fronting because they weren’t wanted and a boundary [asking someone else to front] was crossed numerous times). I stepped in to let Ducky have a break. Immediately got met from Angel to Val. Had a nice chat, was having an okay time, but it felt like Val had more of an understanding “we should know each other better” than Angel. But both feel way too similar to “I know you from source, I want to be friends with you.”

Sure, it can link people together, but that should not be the main factor that plays into getting to know an alter. It can be a shared interest, but if the driving factor you have to talk to someone is because of source, I don’t like that.

Even with 💚, he’s had a few people tell him things that didn’t sit well with him. Flirting with him because of source, trying to get with him because of source, talking to him about source (not bad until you get to the not good parts).

Or, our ex, who also has someone from his source talk to him and use his vulnerabilities against him (he misses his brother, but his brother he knows is in our system but doesn’t talk with him). He has sourcemates in our system, because they share the information from sources our brain has registered. But if you start talking about “brother, I missed you” not only will it make him sob, but you should get to know them first and ask that boundary. Also, I say it because it’s gotten to the point it doesn’t make him sad, it annoys him. Because so many of us are tired of having other systems try and either trigger someone else out or make some of us feel completely unwanted.

I’m going to end the post with making something clear.

You can ask for a boundary. No one has to put their entire list of boundaries somewhere public just so you follow it. If you are not sure that someone will be okay with it, ask. It is decency. So many people seem to forget that asking is better than assuming. Stop assuming, ask questions. Just because one person is fine with it doesn’t mean the next person/alter will be.

[You can ask for a boundary. No one has to put their entire list of boundaries somewhere public just so you follow it. If you are not sure that someone will be okay with it, ask. It is decency. So many people seem to forget that asking is better than assuming. Stop assuming, ask questions. Just because one person is fine with it doesn’t mean the next person/alter will be].

~ Vox/📺

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unhinged-transmasc-man · 1 year ago

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Femininity is as inherently traumatizing to just as many people as it is freeing to others. Queer people need to stop putting something that makes people suicidal on a fucking moral pedestal. Maybe masculinity was a prison for YOU, but that doesn’t mean you have to project that onto men and masculine people who actually LIKE being men and masculine people. Why do people ignore that forced femininity is traumatizing??? One of the essential parts of the patriarchy is forced feminization (and not as a kink, which is another thing that pisses me off; the only way forced femininity is mentioned is as a kink or as a joke in transfem memes). Why are you ignoring this?? Femininity and masculinity are both as real or as fake as you want them to be, acting like femininity is inherently MORALLY GOOD when it causes trauma and very real harm and abuse ALL THE TIME is incredibly wrong and harmful. I’m not going to let you people make me think that feeling dysphoria is morally superior to being who I actually am, just because you think it’s icky and you won’t grow the hell up.

Go see a therapist (or do some work on yourself) instead of doing lateral harm and punching down at queer people. THINK before you contribute to transphobia by repeating the same rhetoric of society and the family members of trans men, transmascs, and masc queer people. Much of the rhetoric that harms trans men and transmascs is about “preserving femininity,” and YOU ARE HELPING THAT!!!!! “Why would you ever not want to be a woman,” “Femininity is inherently more precious and beautiful than masculinity,” “Don’t cut off your ‘womanly’ reproductive organs, you’re meant to be a woman.” THAT’S THE SHIT YOU’RE SAYING!!!! YOU HAVE IDENTICAL RHETORIC!!!!!! Have some consideration for the masculine members of the community you supposedly are part of.

People who say this shit don’t give a single fuck about trans MEN (or any masculine people) because they cannot get it through their thick fucking skulls that gender essentialism is bad. They actually love gender essentialism, that way they can always play the victim or align themselves as “one of the good ones,” and they can project all their trauma from cis men and masculinity onto people who can’t fight back! Because if we do they gaslight us!! They’re doing the equivalent of cishet parents giving their boy or amab baby a shirt that says “ladies man,” only they think it’s progressive, and violently shuts down anyone who corrects them. Everything about pride and queerness is made bright pink, full of upbeat pop songs and glitter. Some of that is fine, femininity has its place. But queerness is not inherently feminine. Queerness is more than “the girls, gays, and theys” (god I hate that phrase). Being a man is not incompatible with queerness. Being masculine is not incompatible with queerness. They can and DO coexist. Manhood and masculinity are both beautiful.

Holy fucking shit queer people really fucking hate masculinity

Like, I know anyone following me has seen me talk about this shit but fuck

This queer movie review podcast is talking about 70s glam rock fashion (a favorite of mine) and the one host says "an effeminate man is his true self, because masculinity is fake, the only way to be real is to be feminine"

Like, what the fuck? First of all, way to discount generations of queer people, and displays of queer masculinity, great job. Second, tell me you've never spoken to a trans man or a butch or literally anyone who's ever been forced into a feminine social role or feminine presentation without telling me.

I hate how pervasive this attitude is. I hate how it makes it uncomfortable, at best, to exist in queer spaces as someone who is not, can not, and does not want to be sufficiently feminine.

#antimasculism #transandrophobia #if you can’t tell this shit pisses me the fuck off #queerness is NOT inherently feminine #femininity is NOT INHERENTLY GOOD OR LIBERATORY

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ouupwetty · 25 days ago

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Also everyone knows how i feel about civil rights

And ppl act like I don’t care about diversity

Like, have you been in a space where you’re seen as beneath for being different, by you ethnicity, sexuality, gender

Diversity normalizes being different

And when you isolate someone due to aspects of them, that are just their identity, you dehumanize them

I cared a lot about intersectional feminism, i shouldn’t have to explain myself? Like if you get it, you get it

And you’re aware I know how anti-blackness exists in multiple cultures, and colorism, and you’re aware that I don’t like the idea of marginalizing others for being different

And yeah, I don’t believe in institutionalized racism for Caucasian people, but I also believe they face a lot of criticism due to white supremacy, it doesn’t represent all white people, but bc of it, ppl will use white guilt

Assuming that will also section people, and dehumanize or make you assume the worst about Simeon you don’t even know, they might even be more understanding about civil rights than me, more educated on it, like bc of being close minded based of off harmful biases, we subjugate groups of ppl

You are very much aware, that beauty is subjective, I like keeping an open mind, giving the benefit of doubt, and not being biased

I do that w everything

If someone comes from a broken home, they should have the opportunity to rebuild themselves, (no I’m not only talking about myself)

And like I can’t believe I have to bring this up to “prove who I am” but I can empathize w a homeless person, bc imagine losing everyone in your life, starving, not being able to shower, no shelter, everyday begging for money, and everyone treats you like shit, ofc you’d go into despair and on drugs, you can’t deal w reality, ppl dehumanize you

Like I asked them if they’re okay

I wish ppl can understand me better

I didn’t expect ppl to witness me speak to her, I didn’t expect anyone around me at all, I didn’t know I was being stalked, she had no shoes on, and if everyone treats you like shit everyday, you won’t be kindhearted anymore

I’m irresponsible, codependent, lazy, fucking gross, I’m a lot of shit

But im also not fucking heartless

I’m a poser sure, I’m closeted, I’m annoying and weird, but why would I try to get at someone when I don’t even know I’m being stalked

Let alone, basically go behind my partners back for a girl on tumblr

My sexuality is meant to be shared w only those who can respect it, and my values are genuine, like I was educated on civil rights for a while, and I had to unlearn things that were normalized

I’m not considerate to a random ass stranger, w literally, I don’t get anything out of it? It’s for their sake

Everyone needs a little looking after, like i even got yelled at, bc they thought I was taking forever to kick out the homeless person, I’m not cut throat

There are a lot of moments, that I don’t need to bring up, and bc I bring it up, it takes away the genuineness out of it

I’m stating that I value the Black Lives Matter movement, I value those who are suffering through capitalism, I value those who have been incarcerated, chipotle helped give employment to those who had been incarcerated, my previous manager was, and she also ended up committing suicide (a sob story ik the mean ppl are gonna say something)

I’m trying to prove my values to ppl, that aren’t just based off of the internet, but by personal experiences, I had a friend who was homeless for a while then his parents took him back in

So while everyone is upset, I had to go against my own values bc of arguments w my partner,

Like, the religious part, I don’t care what you believe in, I’m upset when you use your religion to ignore that I’m dealing w mental health struggles and sexual abuse

Or trying to coerce me into believing in something I don’t, coexisting is fine, I’m rude as shit sometimes, and I’m not trying to be, religion has helped ppl maintain their mental clarity, and they don’t fall into risky behaviors

I’m only offended over homophobia, and I’m very closeted due to that, I try to be hyper feminine, to make up for coming off as masculine

So while every person wants to think “I don’t know who I am”

You don’t know who I am

You don’t think I value certain things, I’m aware, I can be self-centered, and pitiful, and intense

You all don’t understand me, and you all underestimate me, you all constantly seek to over power me, when I don’t even have full on human rights

It’s not normal for me to shower and have sex in front of millions, it’s not normal for me to be hacked and to talk to the earth, it’s not normal to accuse me, just to violate me, it’s not normal at all for neighbors to harass me

So if you want to question what kind of person I am, I might not understand indirect slander, but it’s not like I wouldn’t make an effort to see where someone else is coming from. A “good person” is becoming more subjective now. Can you recognize your values against social influences? Can you recognize your mistakes? Are you willing to understand when it’s not about being right, but understanding when you are wrong?

“Who am I?” I know that, do you?

Like I assumed the worst about Lisa, I’m scared I made her suicidal, I’m scared I had an impact on her. She doesn’t deserve to be put in this position, and neither do I.

Like, I can argue w everyone forever, and just like in my relationship, I’ll be threatened if I’m angry, (people coughing outside my house) idk wtf is going on outside

I wouldn’t fucking harm him like that, I am a whore. But I wouldn’t do that shit. I’m literally innocent.

And given that im not heartless, or cut throat. I’m a cheater. Besides that

Why would I plan messaging all my friends, when I never planned to lose my virginity, I was on my period. I never planned on fucking anything. How would I plan on talking to aldrin? That’s his memories, how would I make Huey say happy birthday, or fucking message me asking “was it ever real between us” and adding me again? How would I fucking plan this shit? I would’ve fucking kept all of my social medias

I kept Snapchat for messages w Arnold

And photos

People are insane

You go off of me falsely admitting, or tripping over my words, and I’m dyslexic too

How would I plan something as I’m going through it? People won’t even look at all the evidence

Where is your logic

Also, there’s records of our texts, and there’s records of me and Huey talking, and me and Ricardo

When I move my head, I’m like here is the proof

I’ve showed it in so many ways, and I’ll continue.

Bc this is for the sake of ppl who DO get falsely accused, and this is for my sanity. I get violated every goddamn day. I’ve lost my sense of safety, my trust for others, and I’m homicidal (emotionally). Wouldn’t you resent the world bc they keep talking about you and watching you have sex. This isn’t fucking normal.

And to see the same ppl who violate me mock me, is a slap to the face. This is literal sexual abuse.

#personal

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devondespresso · 1 year ago

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thank you for your addition to that ace dustin post, i really appreciated your take and your dedication to nuance that the original lacked. like you said, disqualifying the headcanon doesn’t actually address the root cause of why desexualizing dustin in fanworks could be harmful (and not exclusive to ace headcanons) and instead was just ‘i’m right you’re wrong and this is bad’. what bothers me the most about it is how much circulation it’s getting from allos who do not understand it at all, and are just jumping at a chance to exclude aces to be honest. like a post about an actual ace headcanon would never get nearly as many notes as this post is. and that’s upsetting. i’m even more upset that they’re saying ace will is bad when that’s been a headcanon long before he was canonically gay and there is so much canon relatability to me with will that i think lumping that in with this was even more harmful. anyway sorry if you’re getting any hate or anything, just wanted to say you’re totally right! 🤍

sykdjhshhsnh dude this is so sweet i really appreciate it!!

yea it really does suck how posts can get so popular when theres people getting hurt by it. its not even like the all statements are wrong. its 100% a real problem that disabled characters are infantilized and treated like they can't have sex because they're disabled.

its also a real problem that asexuality gets equated to infantilizing or assuming someone can't have sex because they're disabled because of our lack of sexual attraction or the different degrees we feel it. that it carries the implication that asexuals are comparable to infants and can't have sex.

and not only can these ideas coexist, but they're the same side to the argument against infantilization and stigmatizing sex by people who don't fit people's expectations of someone who has sex.

also i appreciate the concern about hate. thankfully i haven't gotten any direct hate from that post and honestly had no idea if it is still talked about. op blocked me (which to be clear im 100% fine with i really didn't want to have a big argument about it anyway) so i don't see the post on my dash and assumed people dropped it after a while. your message was actually the first direct response ive had about outside of the post itself

also also i hadn't seen headcanons about ace will before but i absolutely love it!! theres definitely problems in the fandom with babying him and making him out to be this sweet uwu baby angel too pure for this world and shit but again thats a problem entirely separate from asexuality. i could totally see will being ace, he strikes me as very romantic in season 4 with the painting and his car confession puting so much emphasis on loving mike as a person and what he means to him. they haven't had many chances for physically intimate moments so far so i feel like you could easily headcanon him as any type of asexual and especially if your headcanoning them to see yourself in his character

i hope you have a lovely day anon!! im not super well-versed in the byler fandom but feel free to gush about ace will (or any stranger things characters!) anytime in asks or dms if you feel like it 💕💖💕

#intentionally not tagging super discoverable tags because i really don't want to get sucked into arguments about this #im just out here trying to find happiness talking about queer characters in my silly little hyperfixation #and as someone whos been infantilized for my asexuality my whole life and especially with a certain ex im just tired of hearing-#-that my identity is an insult to a character because people infantilize my identity enough for the general public to use that to define it #get to the root of the problem. address the issues related to it from there. and be nice preferably #tw aphobia #tw infantilization #tw ableism mention #asks #anon answered

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hoomanityisavirus · 2 years ago

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I feel like shit today.

I feel like I don’t deserve to live or that even if I did feel like I deserved to, it wouldn’t matter bc majority of my world doesn’t want me to exist. Majority of my world and my people don’t want my body to look the way it does. They don’t want my personality to act the way it does. They want to curate the content I am giving them while I exist. And instead of me just making peace with that and deciding their opinions are nothing but just opinions, it makes me feel like my brain is on fire.

I want to fling myself off a building just bc a lot of humans are unintelligent and things that are beyond their scope or perspective “scare” them into being the hateful idiots that they are.

Instead of finding differences to be beautiful or interesting, they see it as terrifying and contagious. Too bad we cant convince everyone that Covid isn’t “woke”. Maybe then these fuckknuckles would put on a god damned mask.

I hate it here. I hate that of all the ways WE CAN CHOOSE TO EXIST on OUR PLANET that we choose to force ourselves to pay, in order to thrive here. This is quite literally our world. We run it, we decide how things go here and this is all we made of it? We’ve created a capitalist hellscape so that 14 billionaires and their children can have excess and private jets while the planet physically crumbles & the rest of us starve? We let that happen? HOW? Who?

What??

Really pay attention to that: this is OUR world. Humans. Humanity. The planet earth? That’s a “human planet” when we zoom out to more of a galaxy-perspective. So we, the humans, who own, operate and keep this entire thing going, decided to work at jobs that we literally hate, that take up the absolute majority of our time, every single moment of our existence(because even when we’re not there, we’re thinking about work or the people AT work that we have to coexist with)? FOR WHAT.

This is where I get unhinged because in my not so humble opinion, humans are fundamentally stupid. You can ask any given philosopher, scientist or even someone who’s “born a genius”, they all say it eventually; humans are fucking stupid as hell. It’s why we need warnings on everything because AT SOME POINT, some idiot decided “oh this is totally a great decision I’m sure I’ll be just fine” and then they WERENT FINE.

I mean think about it, at one point creating fire or a wheel was the smartest we could fucking get. The astrophysicists of our world at one time were just: “the weirdo villagers who stare at the skies until their neck muscles seize from the pain of constantly looking upward”.

Even now the dumbest parts of us are based in “yew lewk deffernt than WHUT I want yew tew lewk I HAYTE THAYYYYYTTTTUH”

Like excuse me WHAT???

So because genetically one of us is born with pigment in their skin that’s significantly deeper than yours, THEYRE a problem??! they’ve got literally all the same internal organs as you, their blood turns red when it meets oxygen. They have hair, and thoughts and dreams, but because they don’t look like someone might be able to see through their bodyyy?? Suddenly they’re an abomination and deserve to be treated as “less than” *YOU*??

Give me a fucking break.

So because I don’t feel right having two fat sacks sitting on my chest, you believe I deserve to be killed? That I deserve to have no one love me anymore because I don’t want to create more of…this?

I don’t want to contribute to making more of us because there’s already over 7billion of us here rn and that makes ME “the problem”?

If my eyes could roll further back, they would fall out of my skull.

#i’m so sick #i’m so mad #i’m so done #humanity #mental illness #rant #like enough #i’ve had enough #sewerslidal #unalive #i can’t believe i’m posting this #the whole world is watching but nobody cares #nonbinary #top surgery #trans #woke #all this woke #autistic burnout

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lectergrahams · 2 years ago

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of course ed wakes me up raging again because apparently i’m snoring so horrendously he can’t sleep and we’ve never had this problem to such an extreme until last week and i don’t understand where this came from. but i was so mad at him for it last week when i know i should t have been, that he made it way way way worse tonight by trying to be the one to sleep on the couch. so i’m awoken by him throwing things around my living room and banging shit instead. and he was refusing to take the bed even tho i can sleep on a couch just fine and he cant sleep anywhere at all. but now i’ve just been locked in this horrible thought spiral for an hour about how he’s gonna break up with me over this, how can we ever live together if this is now a major problem that i can’t do anything about bc i can’t control snoring, how he’s gonna break up with me because i still can’t move down to cincy at least another year, how i can’t find a way to live down there bc i’ll probably never be able to afford a place alone but i cannot live with roommates i don’t know/don’t think we can coexist well, how olivia hates this apartment and wants to move next year, but i don’t wanna move to a new place and only live there for one year before moving again, how i don’t wanna be an hour and a half away from my parents and an hour from most of my friends, how all my doctors are in springfield, how my job is in springfield, how i don’t know how i could handle any other job or even find one, how we’ll probably break up if i don’t move down there, how olivia won’t move down there with me, how i feel like she’ll resent me when i do move, how it’s impossible to think about anything in the future without immense fear when it used to be so easy to envision this cool image of my 20s where i lived somewhere cool and never even think about the bad stuff it was jsut this positive fantasy and how maybe if i was capable of seeing any kind of positive future then maybe it would actually happen for me

#personal

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lizzie-is-here · 3 years ago

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girls just wanna have fun

part ii- mariposa

“i can’t wait for you to come my way”

wordcount: 2.9k

warnings: cussing, avengers very poorly faking the internship, brief mentions of: underage drinking, drug use, drugging someone’s drink, violence

a/n: reader is smarter than they planned for lol 👀 also this is more filler, but i’m super excited to write the party scene. enjoy 🤍

taglist: @faiirybread @softasha @edgycatx @happy-nico @local-mr-frog @minimarkive @softyutae

series masterlist

You were always early. To literally everything. School, sporting events, parties… And now, meeting your crush for lunch. Maybe it was a habit instilled by your business-oriented parents, but you arrived at the cafe the next morning at 10:27. Peter and you both agreed to meet at 11:00.

What you didn’t expect was for him to already be there, sitting on a bench and fixing up his hair.

“Um. Hi, Peter,” you say. He jumps, whipping around to spot you.

“Oh, hey (Y/N). Do you- do you always get places early?” he asks awkwardly, stumbling over his words. You smile.

“Yeah. I see you do too?” He nods before jerking a thumb at the cafe’s doors.

“Um… You look really nice,” he stutters, rubbing the back of his neck. “The line isn’t too long if you’re ready to order.”

You peruse the bakery for a while, with Peter choosing a simple iced latte. When you ask him if he’s getting breakfast, he declines.

“I didn’t bring too much money. Don’t wanna spend more than I can save.” Hmm. He was money-smart, unlike the boys at your school that tended to blow any paycheck they got on random shit. Nonetheless, when Peter’s stomach grumbles, you laugh and lift your own purse.

“I’ll pay, Peter,” you offer, grabbing a twenty and a ten. “Get whatever you want.”

“Oh, no, I really couldn’t-“ You grab his shoulders, sternly turning him towards you.

“Peter. My monthly allowance is higher than I’d like to admit. I don’t need any extra money. I can pay.” He reluctantly nods, picking out a breakfast sandwich before you order an açaí bowl and a matcha latte. You pay, generously tipping the young girl with a brilliant smile that leaves her blinking for a few moments after you step away.

As you and Peter grab your order and sit down at a table, you take in the people coming and going. Some rush to wherever their destination is, while others stumble along, barely awake and with bags under their eyes. You check the time. Avengers Tower isn’t too far away, but you have plenty of time. However, Peter mentions that he wants to get there even earlier to get some equipment set up in the lab.

“God, it’s so cool that you have this internship. I hope you don’t mind me jumping on the opportunity,” you say, sipping your drink. The teen shakes his head with an easy smile.

“No, it's totally fine. It’ll be nice to have a- someone else… from school… Ya know, working there too.” You scrunch your nose, smiling as he turns four different shades of red. When he seems to be discouraged by your silence, you pat his arm.

“Peter, you can call us friends. I’d like to be friends with you.” The sound he makes is almost a squeak, but you ignore it in favor of making your way through your food. With anyone else, the silence would be awkward. But with Peter, it feels… natural. Like you could both just coexist without needing to exchange words to enjoy each other’s company. It’s a while before he manages to talk again.

“I really liked the football, rush-thing, whatever, that you did yesterday. It actually almost made me excited to watch Flash wear pants two sizes too small.” You laugh, garnering some glances.

“I thought I was the only one who noticed,” you giggle, remembering all of the times you saw far more of Flash Thompson’s ass crack than you’d ever intended. “The other football guys don’t like him.”

“Really?” Peter asks, mouth full. “I always thought they were all like him.” You wave a hand, shrugging.

“They’re just hyperactive, but most of them are chill.” Your phone buzzes with a call, and as your lock screen lights up, you see dozens of notifications. With a roll of your eyes, you silence the call, returning your full attention to the boy sitting across from you.

His eyes are wide, and he keeps glancing at your phone. “Are you… not gonna answer it?” You shake your head, making a slight face.

“Nah. It’s just some friends harassing me about Matthew’s dumb party tonight. Apparently it’s gonna be a banger.”

“Are you going?”

“Undecided. What about you?”

Peter stammers. “I- I don’t really get… invited to those things.” Your jaw drops.

“You’ve never been invited to a party?” He shakes his head and you lean back in your seat.

He frowns. “Is that, like, bad? Or…?”

“No! No,” you jump forward, leaning against the table. Then, you remember Dawson’s idea. “Do you wanna go to the one tonight?”

Peter thinks about it, and you can practically see the gears turning in his brain. And he’s just grateful you can’t read minds and hear how thrilled he is. His crush. Just invited him. To a party. Honestly, he doesn’t care if the party is in a dumpster behind that one trashy diner a block from his apartment. He’d go anyway.

Countless questions are running rampant through his mind. ‘What do I wear?’ ‘Is there alcohol?’ ‘How do I pretend I know how to take a shot?’ His train of thought is off-the-rails before he remembers that you’re still waiting on an answer.

“Yeah. Sure. That sounds amazing.”

———————————————————————

If you were anyone else walking into Avengers Tower, you would be intimidated. But years of practice truly did make perfect, and you greeted the receptionist politely before Peter led you to the lounge floor.

You straighten your top one last time, applying a last layer of gloss. When the elevator doors ding and open, you’re met with a bustling group of superheroes.

Steve Rogers, James Barnes, and Sam Wilson sit at the counter, the latter two arguing as Captain America tries to mediate.

Natasha Romanoff, Clint Barton, Vision and Wanda Maximoff are on the massive couch. The witch is floating glasses in the air. The Black Widow seems to be the only one to spot you coming in.

A few other Avengers are scattered around the room. It’s almost overwhelming. Almost.

“Hey, everyone, meet the new kid.” Tony Stark appears from behind the fridge, closing the door with a glass of juice in his hand. A few greetings are thrown your way, and the genius billionaire waves a clipboard of papers. “You ready to sign these?”

You nod, and to your surprise, he throws the papers down on a table in the middle of the living room. Peter groans from where he’s standing next to you.

“God, I’m sorry. He did this to me too-“

“Hush, Parker,” Tony says, gesturing for everyone to sit down. You sit in the middle of the couch, staying cool as the world’s greatest superheroes settle in for your interview. This was weird. “Introduce yourself, tell us some things about you.”

You straighten your posture, keeping all of your public speaking lessons in mind. “My name is (Y/N) (L/N), I’m 17. I go to Midtown Tech, and I’m the co-captain of the Decathlon Team, I’m the class president, and my GPA is 4.0. I take all AP courses and also play several instruments in their concert band. My ACT score is a 35, and I’ve passed all of my AP exams with 5s. I’m set to take the SAT in a month.”

The group nods, although a few exchange looks of mild panic. Suspicious.

“What about extracurriculars?” Ms. Romanoff asks.

“I’ve done gymnastics and figure skating since I was five, but recently stopped competing. When I did compete, I won state for both. I also have taken self-defense lessons.” You don’t mention that the only reason you took those self-defense lessons was because your parents didn’t want to leave you alone without some form of protection.

“You’ve got an impressive resume, kid,” Sam Wilson nods. “Look through these papers and I’d say you’ve got the job.”

This doesn’t feel right. It feels too easy.

“Is this a test?” you ask, tilting your head. You notice Steve Rogers go a few shades paler and Sergeant Barnes snicker under his breath. This has to be a test.

Tony waves his hands. “Great job, kid. You caught them.” He shakes your hand. “You were absolutely right; it was a test. And you just got the job.” He shoved the papers towards you.

You dutifully fill them out, pausing to pull your social security card from your purse as you fill out line after line. You hesitate when you get to emergency contacts. Your parents aren’t ever home, so could you even list them?

A few of the team members notice your internal dilemma.

“You put your parents or guardians there. Just in case something happens,” Vision explains, his voice kind and patient. “You… do have parents?”

Wanda lightly scolds him. “Vis,” she whispers, “You can’t ask her that.”

“Oh, no it’s fine,” you say. “They’re just… out. A lot. Most of the time.” You repeatedly correct yourself, hands slightly clamming up. “Ya know, business and other such things.”

“That’s where I know you,” Tony announces, snapping his fingers. “Your dad heads that research board out in Silicon Valley right? And your mom owns that big-shot publishing company down in Florida?” You nod.

“They’re at the apartment maybe… once every week or so? Sometimes together, but most of the time their schedules overlap. I’m pretty self-sufficient.” You take the opportunity to hype yourself up.

“Well, kid, you’re always welcome at the tower.” You smile, genuine and not just a polite-slash-awkward gesture. For as famous as these people are, they’re more welcoming than any adults you’ve interacted with in a long time.

Once you finish signing the papers, Mr. Stark hands them to you. “Would you care to run these down to the receptionist?” You? Alright. You take them with a nod, ignoring the odd request and writing off as the billionaire’s eccentricity. As soon as you’re out of earshot, the Avengers scramble into a huddle.

“This isn’t working; she can tell something’s up,” Natasha says, causing a few people to nod and others to groan. You’re more perceptive than they planned for.

Sam glares at Peter. “You know, when you said she was the top of your class you didn’t mention that she’s practically a genius,” he snaps.

“My school literally is dedicated to higher-level education,” Peter sighs. “How could you not know?”

“Whatever,” the Black Widow snaps. “We need to be more convincing. She doesn’t buy it and, honestly? I don’t blame her. You all are horrible actors.”

“Ouch,” Clint monotones, sipping his coffee.

“So… What is she even interning for?” Steve asks. Tony freezes, uncharacteristically silent. The super-soldier gapes. “You don’t know?”

“Well, in my defense-“

The elevator opens and you step out, a slight bounce in your step. “So,” you say, approaching the group. “What now?”

“Peter here is going to give you a tour, and then you’ll be done for the day,” Tony improvises. He rests both hands on Peter’s shoulders in a silent message. ‘Just play along.’

“I am?” Peter is very bad at reading silent messages.

“Yep!” The teen’s eyes widen as he realizes the plan.

“Oh, yeah. Yeah I’m giving you a tour.” You smile, allowing him to take the lead as he explains everything about the tower, from the names of the receptionists to the snacks in the pantry.

It’s ten minutes before he’s done talking about the lounge floor and leads you into the elevator to visit the training floor.

“God, he’s stupid,” Bucky mumbles behind a mouthful of chips.

Wanda shrugs, narrowing her eyes as she considers your interactions. How you fiddled with your rings as Peter talked. How your smiles seemed just a bit bigger when he made a joke or told some off-topic story about even the most mundane days at the tower. “I think she likes him.”

“Likes that he’s stupid?”

“Yes.”

———————————————————————

“And this… is my favorite part about the entire Avengers Tower.” Peter had been leading you and giving you a full tour for over an hour now, and you were enthralled. He had a talent for storytelling, and each room seemed to have a story for him to tell.

Now, he pushes open a door to a stairwell, ushering you up the stairs and asking FRIDAY, the building’s intuitive AI, to unlock the door.

The view is truly to die for.

Even if the tower isn’t as tall as the Empire State Building, it’s still high enough to take your breath away. Wind whistles around you and you sigh, basking in the sun as the sounds of the busiest city in America surround you on all sides.

It’s all encompassing. And yet, it feels insignificant when you hear Peter’s phone shutter.

“Sorry,” he says, waving the phone. “You just looked so… I don’t know. It’s a really good picture.” He shows you. It is really good.

“I never knew you had a talent for photography,” you tease, bumping him with your hip. He flushes. You both go to sit down on the ledge, and you swing your legs. The height doesn’t bother you, and yet, you feel butterflies in your stomach.

“Um… About the party,” Peter begins, picking at the edge of his t-shirt. “What should I expect?” You laugh, laying down.

“Well, it is Matthew who’s throwing it, so expect alcohol. Some of the best; his dad’s a connoisseur. You don’t have to drink if you don’t want to.” He nods, mentally taking notes.

“There shouldn’t be any hard drugs. Weed at the most. He also invited that nearby school… What’s it called? Oh, yeah, Baxter. And those kids can get crazy. Don’t pick fights, but don’t try to stop one either. If someone bleeds, we get the hell out of dodge. And pour your own drinks.”

“What, why?” He’s so sweet it almost hurts.

You hold up one finger. “Rule #1. Don’t trust anyone with your drink unless you’d trust them with your life. It’s too easy to drug someone these days.”

You both stay silent for a moment, enjoying the pleasant weather. An especially aggressive car horn blares on the street below you. A flock of pigeons passes, probably shitting all over the place.

“Thank you for showing me around,” you say, turning to face Peter where he lays a short bit away from you.

He smiles, and it's like sunshine. Goddamn it. He’s so cute he’s making you spew metaphors. Your AP English brain pauses to correct yourself on such a simple mistake. Similes. You’re spewing similes. “It’s no problem. You’re really easy to be around,” he says, pausing to think for a moment. “If- if you ever want to stop by for dinner, my aunt would be happy to have you over.”

“That’s probably the nicest offer anyone’s made in a while, Peter.” You’re beaming, biting your lip before looking away. “I just might take you up on that.” When you check the time, you sigh. “Guess I’d better start heading home. If you want, we could meet up before the party? I’m probably gonna walk since it’s only a few blocks away. In that little suburbian area sort of thing?”

“Yeah! Yeah, that’s cool. I’ll see you then.”

It takes you approximately 4 minutes and 37 seconds to get out of the tower and far enough away to squeal in excitement. You spin in a circle in the middle of the sidewalk, blushing as you recount every detail from the past two hours or so. It takes you another 23 minutes to get home, and when you do, you immediately begin putting together an outfit.

In these 27 minutes, Peter Parker is completely freaking out. He knows nothing about high-school parties, and to his shock, neither does the team. He’s pacing in front of them, a slideshow presentation projected on the TV.

“If I wear a t-shirt, she might think I’m not excited to go with her. But I can’t wear a button-down or something. Too uptight.” The world’s mightiest superheroes are sprawled across the couch, jotting down notes and brainstorming ideas to help out their youngest member.

And while the room contains national war heroes, master assassins, a genius, and a literal AI, it takes them ten minutes before Natasha sits up abruptly.

“I’ve got it,” she pipes up. “A sweatshirt. Boom, I’m a genius.” She drops her pen and pad on the floor, sitting back with a proud smirk on her face. “But wear a t-shirt underneath it, so when she inevitably gets cold, you can give her your sweatshirt to wear.”

Applause echoes from a few members of the team. Peter takes a deep breath. “Alright, that’s the plan. I’ll run home, get ready, and fill May in.”

———————————————————————

Yes, it took you an hour to pick an outfit. In the end, you simply threw a pair of ripped jeans with the corset top you were already wearing, spraying a ludicrous amount of sweet-smelling perfume on.

Did Peter have to know that? No. He’d texted you an hour after you got home, checking where you wanted to meet and what time.

When he shows up at your doorstep just as planned and you open the door, he chokes on air. As he sputters in your hallway, you lock your apartment, beginning the short walk to the party. You hear it before you see it. Loud conversations, trashy pop music, and occasional cheers echo down the dimly-lit street, Lights shine from the home and booming speakers send soundwaves through your body, reverberating in the very core of your being.

Outside of the house, you reach for Peter’s hand. You smirk, jerking your head towards the door.

“You ready?” you ask.

“For what?”

You open the door, flooding your senses with lights, music, and the overwhelming stench of alcohol. A few friends spot you, cheering as a form of drunken greeting,

You turn to Peter, offering an outstretched hand. He takes it, hand shaking.

“I’m gonna teach you how to party.”

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